Life can sometimes feel like your trapped in relentlessly trying to juggle way too many balls, and keeping all the plates spinning at the same time. Whether it’s managing a career and competing deadlines, raising kids, maintaining relationships, caring for ageing parents or even all or some of these all at once and somehow also trying to squeeze in some personal time for yourself too. No matter how capable and resilient you are, it can lead to an overwhelming sense of exhaustion, disinterest, and detachment. Those feelings bear all the signs of burnout, and it can feel like it's playing a twisted game with your life.
Burnout, often shrouded in silence and misunderstanding, has become the invisible weight dragging many women down. Just like a chameleon, it blends into the backdrop of life, subtly tinting the vibrancy of daily experiences with shades of fatigue and frustration. It's so insidious that many of us don’t even realise it’s happening to us until one day it finally hits us!
Understanding Burnout
Think of a typical day as a row of dominoes - a sequence of tasks and responsibilities, each leading to the next. Now, imagine if these dominos were made of lead, heavy and overwhelming. Every time you knock one down, you feel drained, empty, and mentally exhausted. That is a snapshot of what living with burnout feels like. It isn't just everyday stress or tiredness, it's waking up feeling exhausted before you’ve even got out of bed, it’s the heaviness in your limbs as you carry out normal everyday tasks, it’s the brain fog that leaves you not being able to focus.
Burnout is a syndrome characterised by three key elements: overwhelming exhaustion, cynicism or detachment from your job or personal life, and a sense of ineffectiveness and lack of accomplishment. Like a foggy morning, the symptoms can cloud over your life, making the path forward seem unclear and uncertain.
Now, burnout is as unique as the individual experiencing it. However, common signs you may be sinking into or have already reached burnout include chronic fatigue, decreased productivity, loss of interest or pleasure in activities, irritability, and a host of physical symptoms like headaches or digestive issues, insomnia even though you’re absolutely exhausted.
Being able to identify these signs is the first step towards taking control - just like finding the north star in a starry sky, it gives you a reference point to navigate your way back to health.
Overcoming Burnout
Imagine a puzzle - hundreds of tiny pieces, each unique, each essential to complete the picture. Dealing with burnout is much like solving that puzzle. It requires patience, a steady hand, and most importantly, a strategy.
Self-care is such a buzzword these days, it’s so overused and that it’s lost so much of it’s value, so much so that as soon as we hear the phrase many of us roll our eyes and instantly switch off. Yet learning to be kind to ourselves, to nurture our own needs is the cornerstone piece in this puzzle. It isn't a luxury or indulgence; it doesn’t make us weak or any less capable. There’s no award for working yourself into the ground or pushing ourselves to breaking point, none of us are indispensable, the world will keep turning, even if we’re not around. Taking care of yourself doesn't have to be elaborate or time-consuming - it can be as simple as taking a few minutes each day to meditate, enjoying a cup of tea in silence, or spending time in nature.
Secondly, setting boundaries is essential. It’s like constructing a protective fortress around your precious time and energy. Learning to say no is an art, and once mastered, it can significantly reduce stress and prevent burnout.
Work-life balance is another critical piece of the puzzle. Think of your life as a seesaw - when one side is heavier, the other lifts off the ground, creating imbalance. Finding that equilibrium point where work and personal life evenly counterbalance each other is vital for maintaining your mental health.
And finally, just like a complicated puzzle, sometimes it helps to have a fresh set of eyes or a guiding hand. Seeking professional help, such as therapy or coaching, can provide the outside perspective and tools needed to help you manage burnout effectively.
Surround yourself with supportive people
Imagine standing at the foot of a mountain, daunted by the seemingly impossible climb ahead. Now picture a guide joining you, someone who's scaled this peak before, armed with the right tools, knowledge, and encouragement to help you conquer this challenge.
As a recovering workaholic I can honestly say that finding people who supported me as I started on my own healing journey was so incredibly humbling. I had no idea how to let go of the people pleasing aspect of myself and that fear of failure or of people thinking I was somehow weak or less capable even though my health was at stake. I was surrounded by people who all had the same work, work work, juggle, juggle juggle mentality. You may need to find a new group of friends who have a more healthy approach to life, even recovering workaholics, if you don’t already have people who can support you through the storm, helping you navigate the choppy waters until you reach calmer seas.
It’s not easy to make changes in your life because there will be things that have to change, people you have to say no to, things that you will no longer do. It can be hard to leave the office, switch off the computer at the end of your working hours, if people are used to you working late, or implementing boundaries at home for other members of the household to start to do things around the house or at the very least not to have you at their beck and call. Will there be push back, yes of course and that’s why you need people in your corner to support you and keep you on track as you make some much needed changes.
Conclusion
Navigating the turbulent seas of burnout can seem like an insurmountable task, akin to crossing the Atlantic in a rowboat. The waves of exhaustion and stress seem relentless, the shore of balance and peace an island in the distance. However, armed with the right strategies and support, you can turn that rowboat into a resilient ship, capable of weathering the storm.
Acknowledge the burnout, recognise it for what it is, and understand that it's not a personal failing or an irreversible state.
Your life doesn't have to feel like a never-ending race against time or an exhausting battle against others demands, you can reclaim your energy, and rediscover the joy in life.